Here is the official Spotify “About” description.

I synthesized the best parts of the options we discussed. It balances Leo’s structure (so we look like a real band) with Maya and Zee’s chaotic reality (so we don’t look too real). Even Mr. Claus admitted it was “acceptable, provided no one sues us over the heart rate data.”

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About Static Echo 97

Static Echo 97 is a glitch in the simulation, broadcasting from a basement in Portland. Formed through a series of corrupted file transfers and late-night Discord calls, the band constructs “Nu Gaze” anthems out of the things you’re supposed to delete.

The sound is built on the collision of four distinct noises: Maya’s untreated iPhone voice memos recorded at bus stops ¹¹¹¹, Juno’s 47-layer synth pads sampled from therapy waiting rooms ²²²², Zee’s percussion programmed from actual Fitbit arrhythmia data ³³³³, and Leo’s uncanny valley countertenor harmonies⁴⁴⁴⁴.

They don’t write songs; they archive breakdowns⁵⁵⁵⁵. Their music is the sound of a panic attack at 3 AM, smoothed over by a wall of distortion and infinite reverb. Their manager, Mr. Claus, calls it “unprofessional clipping”⁶. They call it the truth.

“We are the cold coffee on your nightstand. We are the unread notification you can’t swipe away.”

Members:

• Maya: Vocals / Voice Memos / Entropy
• Juno: Synths / Sound Design / Archival
• Zee: Drums / Cardiac Events
• Leo: Vocals / Production / Damage Control

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Next Step:

Now that the profile is set, do you want to generate the first Instagram caption to announce “99 Percent (Stuck)”? (Maya usually handles socials, so expect it to be cryptic.)

Ashes: Hold Up, I never ran the song by the review guy, i’m going to do that now, bbl..

Meanwhile…